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Getting the Agoraphobia Out In the Open
I have a touch of agoraphobia. I think. I’m not sure if that’s what it would be called exactly, but I don’t like leaving home. I also don’t like being without my car. Home and car are security...
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There’s Always An Outside
I listened to a talk by Peter Rollins about demons and those things we demonize. He quotes Bertrand Russell, Imagine you are going to make a catalog, and the catalog lists every catalog that doesn’t...
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To Love Yourself
Love (Photo credit: Swamibu) Most of us would agree mutilating our body because we hate ourselves is unhealthy. Acting against our health by withholding food or making unrealistic demands on ourselves...
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Love is an Ever Changing Thing
I’ve sobbed, I’ve cried, I’ve raged, and I’ve been morose. Sometimes I’ve thought I was like the girl from the link below. I’ve Lost All Faith in Love. Am I Doomed to Be Alone Forever? I have this...
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Meager
Money (Photo credit: 401(K) 2013) It’s time for a change in perspective. I’ve stated too often that I’d rather be happy and poor than to be rich and miserable. Or stated another way, I’d rather have...
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In This Light
Before you repaint your living room, my advice is to always get a big enough sample to try out on the real wall at home. When I was redecorating my home, I picked out many different colors and had...
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Security Alert
Warning! Space less than 2 inches. Air in short supply. The alarms are ringing, every muscle in my body is stiff. My brain is not functioning. Shut down in 10, 9, 8, etc. I have felt extreme panic...
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Afraid to Say No
emotion (Photo credit: ro_buk [I'm not there])I’m not afraid of love. But I’m afraid of loving. I am afraid of loving someone so much that I can’t say no for fear of hurting them, because it doesn’t...
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Bread Crumbs of Fun
Which is better, momentary happiness or long-term fulfillment? Do I eat the cookie or imagine losing 10 pounds? It’s easy to diet when there’s no ice cream melting in the bowl in front of me, but it’s...
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Up
Change….. (Photo credit: B Gilmour.) Change is a lot of work. I’ve update my life and restarted more times than I want to think about. Packing, moving, unpacking. I went through a 5 year period in...
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Your Life is Unfinished
Life is only incomplete and unfinished business. Your life is unfinished. My life is unfinished. Everyone’s life is incomplete. I was thinking this because I was mentally checking my list of things I...
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The Passion of Hate and Love
There are old relationships that I feel scratching to get out of me, like a chick escaping from an egg. Or maybe I scratch to get out of them and their mental hold. I want to be over them, but they...
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Wants, Desires, and Actions
There is an inherent order to life. It’s as old as the earth herself. Desire plus response equals fulfillment. A baby’s cry causes a mother to feed her baby. Want plus action equals satisfaction. It’s...
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Expectations vs Reality
There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said...
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Introvert Malfunctioning
Do the thing that scares you, that’s the advice I’ve read over and over. And I, the introvert, have believed the mantra. I believed the mantra because as an introvert I function backwards in society. I...
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Grandma and the Big Oak Tree
My grandmother was a very superstitious lady, black cats, ladders, salt over the shoulder, and all of that. I remember once, walking across the yard with her and my mother. We lived in a small town and...
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I’m Not Abused, Really
Abuse is about being broken. It’s about seeing things askew. It’s like trying to put on your morning makeup while using a mirror from the fun house carnival. You just never get it right. I just picked...
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Quit
I Can’t Quit You Baby (Photo credit: Wikipedia) Quit – over thinking. Quit – trying to make it work. Quit – wishing, thinking, pushing, willing, trying so hard, all of those things that make you seem...
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Privilege and Guilt
I have been embarrassed by my whiteness, my richness, my entitlement. Embarrassed, ashamed, repentant. Inside I was apologetic, not wanting anyone to think that I believed that I am better than...
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It’s Still The About People, Right?
I think we as a society have forgotten something here. It’s not about the task in front us. How fast can you finish your spreadsheet? Are you a democrat or a republican? We sold more doohickeys than...
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